Shouldn’t You Already Have Your Shit Together By Now? Well I Don’t, So...

First, this is not my typical blog post but it’s something that I’ve been thinking about the last few months. I guess it’s an opinion piece.

I’ve seen it dozens of times in my feed on different social media sites. A friend wonders about the age old question “When will I get my shit together?” At what age are you supposed to have this elusive fecal organization in your life? After you graduate high school? After college? After marriage? *This is assuming your state will even let you marry someone… I suppose that’s a different blog post for a different day.

So I’d like to impart some wisdom on you. None of us have our shit together and anyone pushing you to get your shit together isn’t looking at their own life before they lay that judgement at your feet - or more likely in your feed.

It’s so easy to hop onto social media and see people with their “shit together.” They are everywhere. You see their vacation photos from some exotic island somewhere and you know you can’t even afford a six pack of beer to drown your sorrows in. You see their wedding photos, back-to-school photos, their new big house, hell…. photo’s of them getting their teeth whitened and you think to yourself “It must be nice to have these things…. They must have their shit together.”

They don’t. It may just be that they happen to make more money than you, or have dental insurance, or they found someone they love to spend the rest of their lives with…. But they don’t have their shit together… Trust me.

All of those photos that make them seem like they have it all together are mostly just photos of stuff. Stuff that goes away, jobs that get lost, cars that get repossessed and people that sometimes divorce them and leave.

This is not a pessimistic post… I promise.

All I’m trying to say is that life has it’s ups and it’s downs and the more faith that we put in external things like people and houses and jobs, the more we will miss out on happiness and feel like the ugly duckling because we don’t have our shit together.

Your life is about you being kind to yourself, loving yourself, being kind to others and loving others. All of the ups and downs, oh and they are coming, no matter whether you are up or down right now, the opposite is just around the corner. But these times are simply there to teach you how to love. Yep - that’s the meaning of life right there. All of the trials and tribulations are supposed to make you a better lover and all of the successes are there to make you more humble… so you can become a better lover of yourself and others.

Life isn’t about getting your shit together, it’s actually more about how you handle life when your shit is, in fact, anything but together.

Stop feeling shame because of where you are in the journey - the only shame should come from not loving to your fullest abilities and this mostly includes yourself. This may sound like a selfish statement but loving yourself is the first step to loving others. Loving others is the second step in a happy life and a happy life is what it’s all really about.